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Addicted to the Game
By Carson Cockman
I love the game of golf. If possible, I would embrace the game of Golf and give it a big hickey.
I love the genteel atmosphere of Southern golf courses. Even the loveable old Mooresville Municipal Golf Course and Tire Change/ Recycle facility brings a tear to my eye. It could be the fumes from the landfill but I still love it.
Recently, I was introduced to the Tiger Woods 2007 computer golf game. I say introduced because the situation was much like a drug dealer introducing me to crack.
The first time I played it, I was mildly interested. I mean, what computer can match the timeless beauty of a southern fairway? How can mere electrons hope to compare to a magnolia-laced breeze?
Then, I hit my first birdie. The crowd went wild!
The announcer made glowing comments about my game.
I noticed all the features that allow a crazed golfer to switch golf courses and players. The noise of the crowd cheering me onward to another eagle opportunity made me strangely hungry for more. Soon, I was twitching every time I was unable to play for more than a few hours.
I began plotting the strategy of my next game against my arch nemesis, Vijay Singh, like a Marine colonel planning an amphibious assault.
My son came to visit me and he had to physically stand in front of me the computer to get my attention.
I threatened him with a cyber driver.
Obviously, an intervention was in order.
Last Saturday, I went into my computer room and …GASP!
My computer was GONE!
Feverishly, I looked everywhere. I found myself looking under the couch cushions like a chocoholic looking for his last M and M.
My wife and son cornered me and explained that it was for my own good.
I cried. I wheedled. I begged. I offered them all my money. They refused.
Finally, I hit rock bottom.
I was beginning the long spiral downward into golf computer game D.T.’s
Now, I go to GA meetings.
“Hi. My name is Carson and I’m a golfaholic!”
“Hi, Carson.”
I’ve been without computer golf for three days now. I can do this…I really can.
As long as they never find out that about my secret cyber golf connection at the library.
© Copyright 2007 by Carson Cockman
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